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Ben Kraker

Communicator. Builder. Witness.  ·  Grand Rapids, MI

Meditation
When Jesus Doesn't Tell His Story
A contemplative piece on the silence in Jesus's biography, and what it might mean for how we carry our own past. Written for a guided retreat context.
Literary Fiction Series
SEEN:stories
A multi-volume series following Ira Jensen from the summer after high school through his college years. Ira is gifted, seen by everyone around him, and carrying a wound he cannot name. The series traces what evangelical church culture does to a person and the long, quiet work of becoming yourself again. Paired with devotional and reflective writing as the foundation of a Substack for readers who want fiction and faith that doesn't look away.
PDF  ·  Weight of Worry, Path of Peace
Pathway Practices
A practical guide accompanying the Weight of Worry, Path of Peace series. Exercises and reflection prompts for integrating the material into daily life.
Guided Audio Meditation  ·  Romans 12:1–3
Meeting Jesus in Our Anxiety
A contemplative guide on anxiety, mercy, and the renewing of the mind. Three short audio segments woven through a written guide. Read and listen together.
Audio Meditation  ·  Psalm 46:10
Be Still
A short musical meditation on Psalm 46:10. The phrase dissolves layer by layer. An exercise in letting go.
Transcript
Be still and know that I am God.
I will be exalted among the nations.
I will be exalted in the earth.

Be still and know that I am God.

Be still and know that I am.
Be still and know that I.
Be still and know that.
Be still and know.
Be still and.
Be still.

Be still and know that I am God.
I will be exalted among the nations.
I will be exalted in the earth.

Be still. Be still. Be.
Contemplative Audio  ·  2026
"Listening Room" — Day Alone with God
Produced for a full-day silent retreat. Music, ambient sound, and spoken word designed to create space for stillness and attentiveness to God.
Contemplative Audio  ·  2025
"Listening Room" — Day Alone with God
The previous year's production. Same format, different content. A full-day listening room experience for a church community retreat.
Real Men Hug  ·  Ep. 23
Why Hold Failure + The Reframe
Spiritual direction in a live recording context, holding space, naming the wound precisely, and guiding a cohost toward a truer view of himself.
Transcript
Ben [0:00]

Why do you think it's easier for your brain to hold on to those messages of failure? And it's your fault, Jim. You effed this up. Why is that so much more real to you than the success of being the great dad, the great husband, the great provider that you are.

Jim [0:24]

I'm a good dad. You heard it on air. I'm a good dad. I can say that, and I do believe it. I am not just saying that as an exercise. I know that I'm a good dad. I know that I'm a good husband. I can accept these things. I put a lot of time and energy, thought and decisions that I make in my life have always been about what is the best thing for my family, the best thing for my wife, the best thing for my kids. It's not that I'm incapable of seeing the good. I know that the good is there, but the negativity is louder. That voice is louder. I can believe and know that I'm a good dad, but there's this persistent voice that's telling me that I'm not good enough.

[edit cut]
Jim [cont.]

Good dad, good husband, yes. But it could be a lot better. A lot of these stresses that we're going through right now are financial, and financial things could fix the problems. And so it's my fault.

Ben [1:38]

Why does that have to be your fault? I think 90% of all people out there, maybe even closer to a hundred percent of people even listening to this show, would say that if they had just a little bit more money, they would have less problems. And so, yeah, of course, if Jim made a little bit more money, that would free Jim up to be better in certain areas. But Jim's pretty damn amazing in a lot of different ways and is showing up for not only his immediate family, but also his family of origin. And is going to leave recording here today to go spend time with one of his brothers who's going through a difficult time. And I'm listening to Jim today tell me of all the ways that he's frankly rocking it in life. And then I hear how Jim talks negatively about himself. What if the truth was somewhere between the thoughts you think about yourself and the thoughts that others around you think of you? And what if the true perception of who Jim is was actually closer to the way others perceive you?

Threads Podcast  ·  Ep. 131
Gout to Bike Ride
Ben recounts a health crisis that became the unexpected start of a significant physical transformation — and what it taught him about showing up when everything is stacked against it.
Transcript
Ben [0:00]

I know, it's crazy. So where I was going with the gout conversation was the irony of this is last night I went out for a bike ride and I came back and I listened to this episode and I was like, here I am on episode three, almost three years ago, lamenting how poor of health I am in, how there's these crystals in my bloodstream that are exploding and causing big toe pain. And it's largely due to my lifestyle choices, just how stuck I sounded. It was like, whoa. So the irony of it all was I had just finished a bike ride. It's like just the polar opposite. So just seeing how far I've come is great.

Threads Podcast  ·  Ep. 131
Climb the Hell Out
A moment of honest reflection on perseverance. What it actually looks like to push through when the only real option is forward.
Transcript
Ben [0:00]

Yeah.

Mike [0:00]

Worst case scenario.

Ben [0:02]

So that was the valley. But one thing that I'm really trying to do is when I experience a valley, climb the hell out.

Mike [0:11]

Yeah. Quickly.

Ben [0:12]

Quickly. Like, let's not stay here. Let's not sit in this. There's a time and a place to sit in grief or to sit in sorrow.

Mike [0:22]

Yeah.

Ben [0:22]

But anxious thoughts isn't one of them for sure.

Mike [0:25]

I'm proud of you for scheduling that with your boss. Because it'd be easy to just act like this didn't happen. But then what's that gonna do to you? Your anxiety just keeps going.

Ben [0:40]

Yeah. Yeah.

Mike [0:40]

But instead you're like, okay, let's climb out of this. I'm going to face it no matter what.

Ben [0:45]

Exactly.